Taking a break from blogging here wasn’t planned. In fact, up until my last blog post, I couldn’t get enough of blogging and writing. I had a lot of ideas and I was planning blog posts in advance.
But, somehow, I started feeling out-of-sorts after Typhoon Haiyan/Yolanda happened*. “Business (or rather, Blogging) as Usual” didn’t seem to make sense.
So, I stopped.
And, as always, the longer I stop blogging, the harder it is for me to get back in to it.
I start coming up with all sorts of reasons why THAT particular blog post couldn’t hack it. Or, why I am not ready to blog another topic.
Then, my “Things To Blog About” list becomes longer and longer. And, I become more and more overwhelmed.
And, that whole issue of being unable to get back on to my blogging saddle just get worse and worse.
So, here I am. Trying to stop my excuses. Just to try and blog again.
Silly, Silly Me
You know that feeling you get when you’re watching or reading about a character who’s about to walk in to a trap? That tightness in the chest and the dryness in one’s throat… The instinct that makes you want to shout: “No, don’t do it!”
And yet, somehow, that character still does that very thing you know he/she shouldn’t be doing. And you groan, knowing what a big mistake it was.
Then, the moment the character feels that sinking stomach feeling upon realising his/her mistake, you try not to call out “How stupid can you get?!”
Well, I’m pretty sure that’s what my life would have looked like about 24 hours ago.
As a writer, I know that characters NEED moments like those. In fact, they absolutely thrive through many, many moments like those.
As a living breathing human being, I’d rather not to have such moments.
I know silly decisions and mistakes are all part of life. But, there are different kinds of mistakes and the kind I made yesterday was akin to buying snake oil from a travelling salesman.
Yes, I’d hate to think that I can still be that gullible. But, obviously, I have yet to fully outgrow my 12-year-old self who managed to get swindled a few times through my parents’ business (oh, so many stories!).
That’s why I hardly slept a wink last night, feeling extremely annoyed with myself. That expression of wanting to kick one’s self was definitely real to me. And, I hated it.
But, you know what I’m grateful for?
Even though I know my husband was pretty upset and disappointed for what happened with the metaphorical snake oil, he didn’t lay any blame on me. He acknowledged the fact that we all make mistakes. We make silly decisions. We get taken in.
But, he didn’t stop at that.
Like a knight-in-shining-armour (or an English Prince Charming!), he decided to go and slay the dragon. Or rather, deal with the metaphorical travelling salesman. Even though I didn’t ask to be rescued, and he could have just asked me to go and fix the problem myself (I would have done too), he offered to deal with it himself.
He knew it wasn’t going to be pretty. And, he didn’t want me to go through the ordeal myself. So, even though he is facing a big, busy week, he was adamant about getting the situation sorted.
And sort, he did.
Up until I got his message that the problem was finally sorted, I was feeling pretty awful. But, I felt like Rapunzel finally getting out of the Tower, as soon as he told me that it was all over.
And yes, the process wasn’t pretty but he did it.
I know it seems to be so anti-feminism to refer to oneself as a woman being ‘rescued’ by his man. But, I must admit that in this situation, I’m glad that my man did step up. In fact, I am grateful for every moment when I could count on my husband to be more than just my everyday life partner, but also to become my personal hero.
And, writing of Rapunzel and fairy tales…
This has nothing to do with my silly decision yesterday. But, I thought I’d share this as we are talking about fairy tales anyway.
You see, my kids and I were playing around with my daughter’s new Lego set that she won as a prize the other day. While doing so, my girl ended up coming up with a funny idea during our pretend play time.
So, we ended up doing this quick video, just for fun:
Oh, and as a side note: my 9-year-old son has started his own YouTube channel a few weeks ago. And, he has already gained 10 subscribers. Now, he’s even giving me YouTube advice. Hmmm.
* NOTE: Big special thanks to all of you who shared the Typhoon Yolanda/Haiyan post in your own social channels, as well as to all of you who sent in your support and clicked on the “donate” button.