Posts|Comments

Tag Archives: life

One of These Days…

Day 85 - Project 365 - 25th Mar 08: AUTUMN RAIN

… when you get what you need…
… when you receive what you were hoping, wishing or praying for…
… when what you want is right there in front of you…

Will you recognise it?
Will you know it by heart?
Will you be excited, jumping, dancing?
Will your hair stand on ends? Your skin, prickling?

Or, will it all pass you by -
simply because you didn’t know what you want?
Never hoped, wished, or prayed for what you need?

Sometimes, I just wonder what I take for granted on a daily basis.

Life’s Most Important Treasures

17th Mar 08 -  SOMERTON SUNSET (Dad with Kids)

In spite of how busy, exhausting, trying, stressful, or challenging everyday life may be…

At the end of each day -

It’s always good to know what matters most.

Setting Goals: Time Management for The Rushed (Part 1)

Clock in GlenelgI know I’ve promised a time management series here of some kind, so I thought I’d deliver that bit by bit. As a few of you may have gathered before, some of the most common questions I get often relate to time management. In fact, Marjorie of My Inner French Girl (gotta love that title! ;-)) recently left this comment for me:

“You know, I would LOVE it if you were to post about how you manage your hectic, hectic schedule. I know you juggle motherhood, marriage, a job, your art, your writing, your blog, and God knows what else, so I would love to know how you manage it all. Time management is a constant issue with me — I’m a freelance writer, journalist, wife, part-time library assistant, novelist, and playwright — and one that I don’t have all the answers to. Can you share some of your secrets? Or do you secretly mainline cocaine to handle it all?”

So now, I write this entry, with a confession. And nope, that confession doesn’t involve cocaine (or any similar drug ;-)). It’s a confession saying that I’m actually running way behind on my daily to do list… as in, right now. Yes, I’m first to admit that I’m no Super Woman when it comes to getting things done. Sometimes, I feel I manage to accomplish things just through sheer stubbornness. ;-)

Okay, now having said that, I believe that over the years I’ve learned to adapt my working habits to reflect my current needs. Some days need to be highly structured and planned. Some days, I just wing it. But, one thing that has always worked for me is: Setting Goals.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been creating goals for myself on a yearly, monthly, weekly, and daily basis. Not to mention, creating “life goals”. They can be grand goals (like, Go to Europe) - or mini goals (e.g., Plan & Cook Dinner tonight).

So, basically, things get done because I tell myself that I simply need to do them. End of story. Well, not quite, but you know…

Well now, goal-setting is a topic that I talk about a lot when I work with people. In fact, I’ve talked about this topic enough that I even have a workshop/ebook in the making once upon a time about goals and goal-setting. So yeah, I probably can go on about this for a long time. But, don’t worry, I won’t. ;-)

In any case, when I consulted as a psychologist (nope, not practicing as one right now), I often ask about what people’s goals are all about. I like to encourage folks to create three-fold goals: Long-term, medium-term, and short-term.

Now, a book chapter can probably be written for each of those topics. So, I’ll just stick to writing about something that occupies me the most lately - creating and achieving short-term goals.

Like I wrote here recently, I’m in major catching up mode right now. I’m soooo behind with so many things that I get exhausted just thinking about what I need to do.

Setting Weekly GoalsThat’s why I decided that my iGTD just isn’t cutting it right now. I needed something more primitive (but not easily lost on my pile of To Do stuff), more tactile than a computer app. Enter my small tabletop magnetic erasable board from Board Dudes (bought from Officeworks). I’m also using a set of ‘Day’ magnets to go with it (Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, etc).

I decided to write down all my main goals/tasks for the week on the board. Set deadlines on some of them (either by writing the days/dates - or sticking a ‘Day’ magnet next to the goal). And now, I feel so much better - just looking at it… and marking things off as I go along.

Before this board came along, I just wrote stuff down on paper - and stuck it somewhere. Or, I just left my to do list on a GTD software. I still use those methods… But, I like this board idea right now because:

  • I can easily see my goals - and add/change/check them accordingly. I love that it’s just there - in front of me. I can always glance at it whenever I’m procrastinating or getting sidetracked.
  • It’s more readable than computer or paper lists.
  • I love that it’s physical - I actually had to sit down at the beginning of my week, put the board on my lap, wrote, erased, checked, etc. Put the board back on the table. Then, every time I complete something or need to add something, I just grab and write again. And again.
  • Other than writing, I can stick stuff on it with the magnets - or Post It notes.

Reward-Goals-BoardAnd, one great bit about goal-setting? It’s that nice thing called Break/Reward!

It’s always a good idea to give yourself a nice break - or a reward - whenever you complete a goal in your list. And, if you’re trying to find ways to do things that you love (instead of just completely doing nothing - or something similar), you might want to incorporate that in your goal-setting plan.

As you can see, I’m planning on rewarding myself with some Art/Creativity Time if I meet most/all of my goals of the week. I wanted to work that reward in because I haven’t created much in the last 3 or 4 months - and I’m really feeling it. So, yes… this is one of the ways that I manage to squeeze in some time to do some stuff that I enjoy.

What about you? Do you tend to set goals for yourself? How do you get things done? How do you reward yourself when you accomplish your goals?

Of Kisses, Hugs, and Other Home Remedies

SleepAs a child, one of my favourite parts of getting sick was the feeling of being cared for. And no, I’m not just talking about being allowed to miss school. ;-)

My parents have never really been the ’showy’, affectionate types. But, I do remember enjoying the warmth of my parents’ arms, as they carried me to bed when I fell asleep on the sofa. And, the joy of having homemade soup to comfort my aches and pains. And, how my mom rubbed Vicks on my back and on my chest - and put a warm towel on my head when there was a need for such.

I also recall how my dad used to fill a basin full of warm water (with salt) to give me a foot and leg bath/massage. I can still almost feel my trepidation whenever my toes touched the hot water, which immediately got replaced by relaxation as soon as the soothing feeling took over.

The days of my parents taking care of me in such ways have long been gone, of course. But, I will always remember those moments, especially as I take care of my own kids whenever they’re feeling unwell.

Now, as a parent, I realise just how difficult it is to watch someone you love so much to be in any kind of pain. Especially when you feel helpless to take it all away.

Right now, my four year old still believes that I can kiss and hug away his hurts. I know that this will not always be the case. So, I want to be able to be there - to kiss and to hug every bit of scrape and bump and disappointment that he has - while I can. And, of course, it’s the same for my growing baby girl too.

Yes, the three of us (myself, my boy and my girl) have felt a bit under the weather today. My boy still remained his lively self. But, my girl and I ended up spending a lot of time sleeping and resting - most of the time, in each other’s arms.

I hope that one day, they too will remember these moments of feeling cared for, whenever they feel unwell.

What about you? Do you remember what it was like when you were sick as a child? What were your favourite home remedies? And as a grown up, what are your current favourite home remedies?

Now Back in Action

mum & bubWell, not quite full strength action yet - but yeah, ‘am back at home from the hospital now. With my baby girl Hali in tow. :-)

I’m still in “recovery mode”. It’ll probably take a while to get back to feeling 100%. But, I think I’m heading towards the right direction. And yeah, bub’s doing well too. She needs to gain a bit more weight and such, but we’ll get there…

But yeah, we’re happy and generally in good health. Thanks so much to all who sent in their well wishes. I really, really appreciate it all.

Being a second time mum takes a bit of getting used to. Things seem familiar and different at the same time. But, I’m enjoying it. And, loving (and freaking out at?!) the idea of having a daughter. Since I already have a son, I sort of have an idea about raising boys. But, a girl? It will certainly be interesting to learn what it’s going to be like. Now, I’ve got my very own pigeon pair. :-)

My Work SpaceAnyway, I know that most women need a few months off after giving birth. The thing about running your own business, though, is that there’s a bit more on the line. So yeah, even though it’s only been a little over a week since I got out of surgery, I’m slowly getting back to work. Not complaining, though. The great thing about working for a quasi-virtual company is that the work is generally flexible. Other than the fact that I’m missing out on another b5 team meeting in Toronto (agh - I will meet you guys soon), I’m at least able to continue doing work from where I am, without being restricted to a specific time schedule.

In any case, if I owe any emails or messages to anyone, please give me some time to get back to you. If you need a response urgently, feel free to re-send your email and mark it urgent.

Again, thanks.

Time Management and Multiple Blogging

Darren Rowse recently asked the question of how individuals with multiple blogs manage their time over at Problogger.net (Blogging and the Art [of] Time Management).

A few months ago, I wrote a short article on Time Management Tips for Bloggers. However, I didn’t address multiple blogging in that piece, as I was mostly addressing bloggers who only keep one or two blogs.

So, if I build on that article to address the multi and pro-bloggers group, I’d share 3 Top Tips that I use myself as someone who manages a network of blogs and maintains about 10 blogs at this time (including a video blog and a podcast):

1) Set Goals. Part of the beauty of blogging for most people is that there are no deadlines. You can update once a week or once a month… Sometimes, more. Sometimes, less.

But, if you’re trying to make a living off blogging, then it’s only natural to treat it as a job. It’s fun (most of the time), but it’s still work. So, setting daily, weekly and monthly (even yearly, if you can look that far) can be very beneficial.

It doesn’t have to be “official” - you can just keep your goals in your head, if you wish. But, I’m a fan of lists, so my approach is writing them down as much as possible.

2) Prioritise. Which blogs mean the most to me? I know this is where ‘sentimentality vs. profitability’ comes in for some people who keep several blogs.

Some blogs may not profit as much as the others, but you enjoy writing it the most. Some blogs may be the most profitable, but they’re the ones you may not enjoy as much. What do you then?

In my case, I make my call on which blogs to update the most by using these basic guidelines:

- Which blogs have the most number of visitors/subscribers? (Businesses must always take care of its existing customers and build from there.)

- Which blogs do I wish to grow? (Based on potential to earn money and to grow its following.)

- Which blogs are easiest to update? (If I have existing material or I’m busting to write about something, then it makes it easier to update a blog.)

- Which blogs have “timely” issues? (Who was it that said, “Old news is not news”?)

3) Get Breaks. Blogging becomes more effective if you get some breaks in-between. One advantage of having multiple blogs with different topics is that I get “mental breaks” when I write about blogging one minute and then create a travel video the next.

Apart from mental breaks, time-wise and physically, it’s important take breaks too. While I spend around 10 hours or more online on a daily basis, weekends are usually spent away from the computer as much as possible. Even throughout the day, I try to get food breaks, TV breaks, reading breaks, walking breaks, housework breaks, and of course, time-with-baby breaks (yes, I’m a full time mum too).

I find that taking time for different things in my life help me to avoid distractions and to keep me away from procrastinating too much.